enjoy reading but not so much blogging.

So, I have found that since I have started this online blogging, I have learned so many new things about my family and friends that I did not know before. I go to their blog every other day hoping that they have posted something new for me to read about. I enjoy reading about their every day life, the things that they are struggling with. I know there are many times that I think "but my life is so boring, why should I even bother to put that up there?" Sometimes Jonathan says " are you really going to put that on there?" But, I have felt more connected with some people through this and have learned great things from them. For instance, I have learned some interesting things from my uncle Rick that I did not know before. The song he wrote for Uncle dennis at Christmas time, I have never heard that and I would love to hear you sing it.. I also feel some of Katie's pain on balancing being a mom and all the things that go with that. So, I would say continue to blog away!! I love reading about each of your lives... And even though my life is not an exciting roller coaster, I will do the same and hope that we can all stay connected, even if it is only through our words and stories.

16 years, WOW!!

So, today is Jonathan and my anniversary. We have been married for 16 years. That sounds like such a long time to me. I think back to all those years ago, when I was so young. We got married in my parents front room by Jonathan's bishop and were sealed in the Salt Lake temple 2 years later. I don't think either of us realized the ride that was in store for us. The Lord has truly blessed our lives so tremendously. I have a husband who loves Jesus Christ. He stands up for what is right and true, even if it is not the popular thing to say or do. He is a good man, who has the desire to be better. He loves me and our children. I am blessed with a great companion and am glad that we have been able to grow up together and have 4 beautiful children together. I look forward to staying by his side for another 16 years, to becoming mission companions together and even grandparents. I love him very much and feel so blessed that he is my husband.

Faith or Fear?

As I was reading my cousin Emily's blog on the things we fear, I started to think about what rules my thoughts in my daily life. Do I live my life based on what I fear or what I have faith in or maybe both? It seems that lately this is what is intended for me to really contemplate. I have read book after book lately about how I really am the creator of my own life. Whatever circumstances I am surrounded with is essentially my own creation and they start with my own thoughts. So many times, I really am not aware of my thought process. So, the last 4 or 5 books I have read is about that. If I am not happy with how my life is going, than can I change my thoughts? I know it is so much easier to type than to actually do. I think it takes practice. If I could get everyone a present this year, it would be the book "As a man thinketh." by James Allen. It is only about 75 pages and really has great truths in it. I hope to get better at being aware of my thoughts and realizing that I control much more of my life than I realize..

Adversity reveals character

Adversity reveals character. Sometimes we feel justified in blaming circumstances or the provocation of others for our bad attitudes. Perhaps the best test of our true character is what we do in the face of our circumstances and despite the provocation of others. I think this quote from C.S. Lewis gives a great perspective:

“Surely what a man does when he is taken off his guard is the best evidence for what sort of a man he is? Surely what pops out before the man has time to put on a disguise is the truth? If there are rats in a cellar you are most likely to see them if you go in very suddenly. But the suddenness does not create the rats: it only prevents them from hiding. In the same way the suddenness of the provocation does not make me an ill-tempered man; it only shows me what an ill-tempered man I am. The rats are always there in the cellar, but if you go in shouting and noisily they will have taken cover before you switch on the light.”
C.S. Lewis, Mere Christianity

Be prepared now for the lights to come on at any moment – Merry Christmas everyone!

not 18 anymore

Yesterday I refereed 3 games. After the first game, I was feeling great.. no problems. My left knee had been hurting earlier but I was able to do the game pain free. I thought "I can do this." After the second game, which I might add was the mens league game, I was hurting a little bit. My left knee was aching but so was my right. This presented a bit of a problem but I thought I can get through this. By the time I was half way into my third game I did not know if I was going to make it. I thought I was in good shape but, my body was telling me otherwise. The last 5 minutes of the game were hard. Luckily, the men I was reffing were out of shape old guys and they were tired also. So, there was not alot of running those last few minutes. Mostly, lots of 3 point tries. Well, I did survive. I am very sore this morning and my right knee is throbbing.... The lesson I have learned is sadly I am not 18 anymore. As much as I wish I was physically, I am not. I have 2 more games this week lets hope my poor body will cooperate.

But, it was not to bad refereeing all those men. We did throw one guy out of the first game for bad mouthing and I did have a guy get up in my face on the second game which I did tell him very sternly "get out of my face or you will not play anymore." If they get one technical foul they have to leave the building. He was not happy about that and later apologized to me for his behavior. But, for the most part being a woman played to my advantage. Most of the men were respectful.

2 teenagers

Friday was Devin's 13th birthday. I let him stay home from school and Jonathan and I took him to lunch. He than invited some friends over that night for a party and sleepover. The hardest thing for me is that he is now a teenager. I have 2 teenagers. I remember so well the day he was born. There was a big snow storm and we had to drive from Springville to American Fork. Amber was supposed to take Aubrey but, we didn't have time to drop her off so we took her to the hospital and Misty ended up coming and getting her because she lived in American Fork at the time. Well, about 10 hours later he was born at 6:10 in the morning. He was my biggest baby at 8 lbs 14 ozs. I am very blessed to have him as my son. He is wise for his age and understands gospel principles with ease. I am blessed with amazing children and good teenage kids. But, am I really old enough to have children this age?

Yardstick for personal success

I was reading an article and came across a great poem by Ralph Waldo Emerson. I hope you enjoy it as much as I did.

What is success?
To laugh often and much;
To win the respect of intelligent people
and the affection of children;
To earn the appreciation of honest critics
and endure the betrayal of false friends;
To appreciate beauty;
To find the best in others;
To leave the world a bit better, whether by
a healthy child, a garden patch
or a redeemed social condition;
To know even one life has breathed
easier because you have lived;
This is to have succeeded.

lack of communication

So, on Monday I lost my cell phone. I am not sure where I lost it at but, it is gone. Than yesterday, my modem went out which connects my Internet and home phone, good ole comcast. I don' t know if I think that digital phone is such a good idea. So yesterday I was without a way to communicate to the outside world. It will be tomorrow before they can get anything fixed. It made me realize just how much I rely on technology. Atleast we still have Jonathan's iPhone. I can connect to the internet with that so I can type this up and tell you of my woes. Ha ha

No one will intimidate me!

So, I started to referee basketball. I have done two 9th grade girls games and I will be doing a boys game on Tuesday. But, I am worried because they just assigned me mens league games for next week. The lady I refereed with last night said " don't do mens league games. They are a bunch of sweaty old guys that are just going to hit on you and try to intimidate you." So, today I check the games that were assigned to me and wouldn't you know it, I have 2 mens league games assigned to me.... I just keep telling myself, that I can do this! No one will intimidate me!! I am an amazing referee.... (positive imaging) So, hopefully it will go well and that my partner is a big man that will hurt anyone that comes near me...

Joel Deany the Great

So, I found an old video of Joel that it so funny. It shows his personality exactly. He was always joking and having a good time. I love and miss him so much. I hope you will enjoy this as much as I did.

Bond Family Game of Life

So, I have been struggling with how to motivate my children to get their chores and homework done without me nagging them all the time to do it. I spend lots of energy trying to help them and coerce them into keeping up with their responsibilities to this household. My friend in Logan has been implementing a plan for a few years now that is truly amazing. We have been doing it for 3 days and it has been great, no more nagging, fighting or anything else. I think I want to market this, it is so good. We call it "The Bond Family Game of Life" So this is how it works

Everything that is expected of them whether it is brushing their teeth or doing their job has a value to it. For example, if they make their bed they get a Bond buck. If they brush their teeth they get a Bond buck and so forth. But, the opposite applies also. If they say unkind words they lose a Bond buck. If they hit they lose $2. There is also a charge for maid service. If they forget to make their bed and I do it, they owe me double what they would get if they had done it. They also have to pay for privileges. $10 Bond bucks to have a friend over. Depending on what they want, the price of the privilege goes up. It seems to really motivate them to do the things that are required and even do more. Kind deeds is worth $2 bond bucks. So, they are looking for things that they can do to be kind and talk kind. The fighting has decreased in only a few days. We also give them the option of trading in 50 Bond bucks for $10 US dollars. Here is some of it so you can get an idea.

THE BOND FAMILY GAME OF LIFE


Job Description/ Earning/ Consequence

Make bed daily (morning)/ $1.00/ maid service -$2
do daily job/ not/asked $4.00/2.00/ maid service -$2
put away shoes/socks/ $2.00/ maid service -$2
do homework by 5:00 / $3.00 / -$1 every half hour
laundry on assigned days/ $5.00 / maid service -$3
put away school stuff / $1.00 / maid service -$1
obey mom/dad first time / $1.00 / lose $2 each time
brush teeth morn. & night / $1.00 / 0
read daily scriptures / $5.00 / 0
wake up on your own / $1.00/ 0
put away own dishes / $1.00/ maid service $2.00
bed on time / $3.00 / -$2
clean room / $2.00/ maid service -$4
speaking kind words / $1.00 /
kind deed / $2.00
using manners at table / $1.00
shower/ $1.00
cleaning windows / $1.00
change/wash sheets/ $3.00
morning/ evening prayers / $2.00
clean out car / $4.00
read book to Haylee / $1.00
Make/Serve meal (weekly) / $5.00
be ready on time for school/ $1.00
ready for church by 8:30/ $4.00
turn lights off/ $1.00/ maid service -$2
feed Jack / $1.00
take out trash/ $1.00

hitting -$3
tattle telling -$1
teasing of any kind -$2
calling names -$2
yelling -$2
interrupting -$2
eating out of kitchen -$1
leave dirty clothes in laundry room floor -$1 per item
bossing -$2
borrowing without asking -$2
snacking without asking -$2
unkind words/being rude -$2
whining -$2

Cost of Living Weekly: Due Saturday by 5:00

Room and Board: $5.00
Electricity: $3.00
Gas: $2.00
Food $2.00
Phone $1.00

$50.00 dollars earns you these privileges:

Sleepover, movie night, date with mom and dad, bowling, personal item, out for lunch, $10.00, you choose with parents approval.


$30.00 earns you these privileges:

late night, stay up extra hour, $5.00, rent a game or movie, 1 chore pass, Yummies ice cream, dollar store, out for lunch


$15.00 earns you these privileges:

play 2 hours of video or computer games


$10.00 earns you these privileges:

have friends over, go to friends house

Well, I don't know if this makes sense. But, it has worked well for us. I am excite to continue implementing it. Any questions?

Thanks "living"

So I read this great little article called Thanksliving by James Ray. I wanted to post it on here for others to read... I hope you all had a great Thanksgiving. I love spending time with my family. They are the most important thing to my life. It was great getting together to laugh and eat and laugh and eat some more... Anyway, here is the article

"You may be aware that while I was growing up, my father was a Protestant minister. For years, I attended service three times per week and, like most kids, often just wanted it to "hurry up and get over with."

However, with my current understanding of the mind, I now know that while I sat in service and doodled, fidgeted or pestered my little brother, my unconscious mind was wide open and received many great teachings and truths.

One of those teachings came back to me in my meditation this morning, and I thought it was very appropriate for this week.

I remember my father saying almost yearly from his pulpit, "We need to not only practice Thanksgiving but 'Thanks Living'."


While some who don't understand the power of energy, vibration and attraction may think that gratitude is not a big deal, I can promise you that:

Gratitude is the mother of creative vibrations.

You see, when you're grateful for what you currently have in your life, it focuses you on the best. And that puts you in a vibration (feeling) to attract and receive more of the best.

When you have a lack of gratitude in your life, you're focusing on the worst, and that puts you in a vibrational feeling that attracts to you more of the worst."

Life is a self-fulfilling prophecy and YOU are the prophet.

Now as you stop and think about this, it's very practical.

Think about the person who's constantly ungrateful and full of complaints and problems. Do you want to be around them... much less help them? Probably not.

Conversely, think of someone you know who's constantly grateful and appreciative in life. Same question: Do you want to be around them? Would you like to help this person if possible? Probably so.

The universe and all its inhabitants line up in support of the person who's in a vibration of gratitude.

Here's my recommendation as you move into the Holidays this year: Make the theme of the Holiday Season "giving thanks."

While eating turkey and watching football may be the norm around your household, sit down for a least a few minutes and have each family member (including you) list out loud at least 3 things that you're grateful for. -James Ray

I hope that we can all remember to have more gratitude for the great things that we all have in our lives. There are so many people that have touched my own life for the good. Thanks to all those people. I am sure if you are reading this, you are one of them.. Love you all! Melanie

30 things about me

1. I love sushi.
2. I start refereeing high school basketball at the end of this month.
3. I am double jointed in my thumbs.
4. I love vampires, especially the good ones.
5. My idea of camping is a 5th wheel in a RV park.
6. I love hot cocoa. I could drink it anytime of the year.
7. I love summer and warm weather. The idea of winter makes me wish that I could move to San Diego.
8. I have been married for 16 years in December.
9. I wear contacts
10. I can still do a back flip on my trampoline.
11. I love to watch, play and referee basketball.
12. I am a mom of 4 kids.
13. I love to read self help books. Putting it into practice is the hard part.
14. I do not like birthday cake. I like birthday pie..
15. I live in the house of my dreams.
16. My favorite movie of all time is Pride and Prejudice. I love a good love story.
17. I still keep in regular contact with my best friend from elementary Julie Thatcher.
18. I love the rain, hate the snow but love the rain.
19. I have never been tanning.
20. I am an amazing speller.
21. I do not like scrapbooking, not very good at it either... I really have tried.
22. I do not pay attention to the details of things. My husband is the opposite.
23. I love music, almost all kinds. There are a few exceptions and I really like to sing even though I suck at it.
24. My favorite holiday is Thanksgiving. I love to get together with my family. They are great.
25. I have had my appendix and tonsils removed.
26. I love exercising but hate to run.
27. I have been a wolf leader, bear scout leader and am currently a webelo leader. I know alot about cub scouts.
28. I will eat almost anything once. I love food..
29. I love the gospel of Jesus Christ with my whole heart, mind and soul.
30. My hands are constantly cold.

sad news.....

Well, I write something and than I erase it. Then, I do it again. I am not sure how to say this or what exactly to say.

I went to the doctor today because of some complications that I have been having over the weekend. So, they scheduled an ultrasound for me today. I hate that. The tech does the ultrasound and than she keeps the monitor close to her and I ask her "is everything ok?" But, the only answer I get is " I want to let the radiologist look at this. I will be back in a minute." then she is gone for like ten minutes. When she comes back she says "your doctor is on the phone." That is not good.

Well, I have what is called a blighted ovum. This is what it is.....A blighted ovum is a common cause of early pregnancy loss. It occurs when a fertilized egg develops a placenta and membrane but no embryo. An ultrasound will show an empty gestational sac. Blighted ovum is often due to chromosomal abnormalities in the fertilized egg.

I am very sad. I do not know if I want to even think about trying again..

Bound to happen

So, Haylee and I were sitting eating lunch today and she stops eating and looks at me and says "mom how did you get pregnant anyway." I could of just spit my food everywhere. She is only four.  Why is she asking those kinds of questions?  Jerin,  who is nine, hasn't asked me those kind of questions yet. So, not quite knowing how to answer it for a 4 year old to understand, I said  "well first you have to have a husband and than he helps you get pregnant." that was my explanation of it. Okay! lame... I know. I was caught off guard. I should have already had it worked out in my mind, but I didn't. I mean last week she asked "how is the baby going to come out? " My great answer to that was "the doctor is going to help." She had no further questions. So how much do I share with a 4 year old?  I guess I should prepare for what is next... the only problem is, what is that going to be?

Human Life balance sheet

So, things in life have not been running as smoothly as I would like them too. Life at times seems very unbearable. So, how do I get better at this? How do I look at what is going on around me and say "what can I learn from this" because lately all I have been saying is "when will this end."

So, how do I find a balance of serving and being served. A wise person told us to look at life on a balance sheet, sort of like we do with our finances. Are we being served more than we are serving? Are we serving and serving but not allowing others to serve us? Are we taking more than we are giving?

This life sometimes feels so overwhelming. I feel there is so much that I have got to learn and there is no time to screw up because I have 4 children that count on me and my sanity. So, I will be glad when the only question that I ask is "what can I learn from this?"

Was it a Bear?

So, last month I get a phone call from a neighbor asking if I heard about the Bear. I had been watching the news and a story came on about a bear that was seen in the vicinity of Springville high school, which is about a block away from my house. So, I told him "yes I had heard the story on the news." He precedes to tell me that the bear was 2 houses away from mine and to make sure that I do not let Haylee out unsupervised and to bring my dog inside until they catch it. Well, they never caught it.

So, a few nights ago, I was sleeping in my room and I was awakened to a loud shuffling noise on my deck outside my room. I have 2 lounge chairs that were being pushed into my glass doors that lead to my room. I was just praying that they were locked and would not open. I kept thinking "either it is a stupid burglar or something else." I was hoping it was just a deer. We get deer often in our yard, so I hoped that was what it was. I did not dare get out of my bed to check just in case it was the bear. I just knew if the bear saw me, that glass would not do a whole lot to prevent it from coming in and eating me.

Of course this was a night that Jonathan fell asleep in the front room. So, I will never know what was on my deck and that is fine with me...

Halloween Party Fun!!

On Saturday night, we went to my cousin Amy's house and had a fun Halloween party. I am not one who usually dresses up. In fact, this is probably as Halloween as I get..... a cowgirl.... but, Jonathan has finally gone back to his original roots.. He felt so at home in this get up. I think he had a hard time going back to a shirt and tie for work.
We all had a great time with family.


Jonathan the Cholo and Melanie the cowgirl


Summer and I look a like and think a like too!!


Jonathan and L have a stare down


Amy makes a cute Little Bo Peep

cravings and conversation

So, I have been craving the Pork salad from cafe rio lately. I mean I really have forgotten what it is like to be pregnant. Because this is not just yummm!!! that sounds so good right now.. It is I want one RIGHT NOW!!!!! So, no matter what I am doing I will make the 20 minute drive to cafe rio, which really is alright because when I call ahead that is how long it usually takes to get it ready. So, I took my third trip this week to Cafe Rio earlier today. Haylee is getting the routine down well. But, since we have about an hour in the car together, we have some interesting conversations... They go something like this

"mom, there is the temple... Why do we get married in the temple?"

" So we can be together forever."

" If you and dad are going to be together forever shouldn't you get along and want to be together? "

or something like this "mom when is this baby going to come out?"

"Well, it will come in June, close to Aubrey's birthday."

" When I get married forever, I want to have lots of kids.."

"Really, how many do you want to have?"

" I want to have a million."

"WOW! that is alot of kids."

" really?, well than maybe I will just have 7."

I love her so much... She is such my sweet little girl and my intellectual conversation for the day. It is times like this that I think " Ya!! We get to do this again.." Oh! and I do love my husband very much and really want to be together forever. But, leave it to a child to let me know that I must do better......

Really, another one?

So, I guess the best way to announce this is in a blog, right? Well, the Bond family will once again be growing... I am pregnant and due June 8th. I am feeling very mixed emotionally about this... I am happy and apprehensive too. Haylee will be 5 and a half when this baby comes into the world. I have given all my baby stuff away. I will be starting over again. On the other hand, it will be such a great joy to have a little one in this home again.. But, I don't feel pregnant yet. So, it is not quite real. I will let you know when it becomes more real to me.

What am I doing?

So for the past few months, I have been trying to figure out what I want to do or be or whatever you call it. I now have all 4 of my kids in school. I have been contemplating if I should go get a job or if I should go back to school. I am not sure. So, I have been trying it all out. I applied for UVSC and BYU and applied for a job. I did this in the spring and have not followed through with any of it. I have got to let go of the fear that I can be good at something besides doing laundry, dishes, taking care of my kids and husband. I can be around other adults and have an intelligent conversation.